Demoted to Dumbphone

9 Mar

This is my current phone.

Ready to be impressed? It has a mirror right by the camera lens so you can take a “centered self portrait,” as the manual put it.

Wanna know why I’m living on the cutting edge of 2009? Because God told me to.

Yes. God told me to put down the lovely Samsung Note with all the bells and whistles and pick up her (almost) long-forgotten older spinster sister.

I don’t know about you, but God often talks to me when I’m in the shower. It’s quiet in there. No kids, no electronics, no music. Just me and my thoughts. And God. So last Sunday morning, I was praying about an issue with one of my kiddos as I was lathering up my locks, and God asked me, “You say you’d do anything for your kids – would you really?” I knew almost instantly what He was asking of me – “lay down your beloved Android appendage for the good of your child.”

Now, before you get all skeptical on me, let me give you a bit of background. Said child has commented more than once on my Android appendage. The other 3 children haven’t so much as made a peep about it. They don’t notice and/or care that Mommy’s phone is actually her favorite child. But this kiddo noticed and was noisy about it. I feel a kinship for this child, though, because we share the same addiction – electronics. I have the maturity and self-control to be able to walk away (most of the time), but that muscle in me is weak. And if it’s weak in me, I can’t imagine how powerless my child feels facing the pull of the phone, tablet, XBox, DS, or computer.

So there I was, soapy and arguing with God. I won’t go into the details of the conversation, mostly because they would reveal the immature person I was at that moment, but you can imagine, I’m sure. I knew I couldn’t say no, but I wanted so badly to pretend like the conversation didn’t happen. I tried to bargain with God about it: “How about if I turn off my data and just use my miniature computer for phone calls and texts? I’ll delete all my other apps.” I knew the answer as soon as I asked the question – “Really? You’d ONLY use your miniature computer for phone calls and texts? Try again, Android Girl.”

This went on for a while. I won’t bore you with the details of my mental gymnastics as I tried getting around what God has asked me to do. It was like Jonah going to Joppa instead of Ninevah. Fortunately for me, though, I realized my error before God sent a big fish to swallow my phone. Or before it took a swim in a toilet. I started thinking about things, and how this development could positively affect my kiddo. The one for whom I said I’d do anything.

I started thinking about how to do this. If you’ve never had to downgrade from a smartphone to a basic phone, it takes a lot of work. It took me a while to actually get my hands on a suitable phone. God didn’t say that I couldn’t have a qwerty keyboard, so that was my first requirement. I sweet talked my mom out of her red Samsung Intensity. Flashy! I have a red phone. I’ve never had one of those, before. She’s long-since moved on into the smartphone world, and wasn’t even sure if she had Ruby (what I’ve named red phone). Sure enough, Ruby arrived in the mail this weekend…but without a charger.

Who would have thought that I would have needed a charger for an old phone? Not me! That’s why I got rid of those old chargers years ago. I had to scrounge around on Facebook to find one (thanks to KT and L!!). I got it and charged good old Ruby up.

Then I had to figure out how I was going to activate her. She doesn’t have a SIM card. I spent about 24 hours on the Verizon website trying to work this out, but I finally got her up and running.

Another issue? Forwarding my calls and texts from the Note to Ruby. The calls are the easy part – the texts are something different altogether. Yes, there are apps for that, but when Ruby gets a text from Note, it comes from my other number, so if I want to reply, I have to type in the number manually. Geez! Such problems, right? And don’t even get me started on exporting my contacts from Note to Ruby. One. At. A. Time. And each contact takes a minimum of 8 button clicks on Ruby to get it imported.

I’m secretly looking forward to my time with Ruby, though. I’m looking forward to spending time with my kids and really engaging with them. I know this isn’t forever (honestly, I think I might be back to the Note by summer), but in the meantime, I’m looking forward to what God is going to teach me, and how my relationship with all 4 of my kids and my hubby will change for the better.

So if you hear an old-school cell phone ring-a-ding-dinging while you’re out in the world, remember That Nolen Chick and ask God to give me a little wisdom about my dumbphone adventure.

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4 Responses to “Demoted to Dumbphone”

  1. rjcummins March 9, 2015 at 7:51 pm #

    You are a good Mama. I’m proud of you. 

    Sent from my Verizon Wireless 4G LTE smartphone

    • That Nolen Chick March 9, 2015 at 8:54 pm #

      I’m amused that you sent this comment from your smartphone. 😀

  2. Laura March 9, 2015 at 9:15 pm #

    Bravo! This is huge. The other day I referred to you as one of the most tech savvy people I know. It’s impressive that you want to help your child in such a tangible way. I’m proud of you.

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